For year’s now, I’ve been “going bananas” trying to find the Snapple ”Go Bananas” flavor in delis who would sell it consistently and now they’re discontinuing it! :(
*SNIFF* I loved Snapple! We had something special and beautiful together. I’d pay them money and they’d give me banana juice & Real Facts. I can;t live without that relationship.
Hey, Snapple, here’s a Real Fact for you: “One of Snapple’s best customers doesn’t know if he can go on living without “Go Bananas”!
*SOB*
Do you even know how hard it is to find bottled banana juice in stores in the tri-state area? I have to drive an hour away to Corrado’s! Once there, I endure the sights, sounds and smells of disgusting, international, third-world goat parts, cattle genitalia and the stench of a thousand rotting cheeses!
My investigations have led me to several deli workers that stock shelves and order the shipments who claim Snapple canceled that glorious, liquid-orgasm of a juice product because of quickly spoiling puree and lack of popularity. Really? Diet Coke works as a spermicide but you can’t improve your puree?
Some creative marketing was all it would’ve taken to keep the love of my life on shelves. People I’ve talked to over the years have never even heard of banana Snapple!
*SIGH* If only there was some way I could go campaigning to make this a non-private sectror issue. Shit, I gotta get me a Super PAC, before those are (hopefully) discontinued as well.
Sincerely and with all due respect, The Rev. Sir, Dr. Kevin M. Kinnelon-Piastra, P.H.D. (Piastra Honorary Doctorate) Dictated, not read.
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